The older I get, the more I feel the need to improve myself. Back in my twenties, I had ALL the answers. Now I’m well into my thirties, it’s dawning on me that I couldn’t have been further from the answers.
My desire for self-improvement led me to the world of non-fiction. Thanks to my friend Donna Hay, of GozenGirls and WildWoman fame, I found The Goddess Revolution by Mel Wells. Donna described it in one of the GozenGirl podcasts as the one book she would want to give to every woman in the world.
“If you’ve ever struggled with diets, food, body image or your weight” – yes. This is 100% me for 95% of my life.
“…then The Goddess Revolution is your new handbook for life. Imagine how much you would fall in love with your life again if you weren’t so consumed by negative thoughts about food, your weight and your body.” – Also, how much of my time would I get back to be thinking about other things?!
“Imagine if you could effortlessly find yourself at your perfect weight, in your perfect body and feel happier and freer around food than ever before.” – SOLD!
Okay, full disclosure. I love cooking and I love to eat amazing foods. My issue is body confidence. I have been a size 12 since forever. My friends lament about their skinny teenage years but that was not me. If anything, I’m in better shape now than I was then. I’ve spent most of my adult life ashamed of my less-than-skinny body. Not unusual.
Having time to sit down and read is something I NEVER prioritise, and my eight-year-old-self is ashamed of me for saying it. But I do have a lot of ‘dead time’. A time where I am commuting, whether by car or train. So I downloaded the book from Audible and start listening.
Mel reads the words of her book out loud on Audible, and so many things she says rings true with me. Based on her words, I imagined getting down to my goal weight and having my perfect body. Would I be happy? No, probably not. I’d be finding something else about myself to criticise. Or I’d set a new goal weight and have a new idea of what would make me happy. Mel’s suggestion was to find whatever it is that will make you happy, and that’s not necessarily going to be hitting that elusive number on the scales.
Half-way through the book, I went for a long 6-mile walk, I’m on a step-challenge – gotta keep steppin’). I listened to Mel read the book for a good three hours as I walked through the beautiful Farthing Downs and Happy Valley towards Caterham and back again. Hearing Mel dispel all the myths I have about body positivity and tell the stories of some of her other goddesses amongst the beautiful scenery was so good for the soul.
So – after reading this book. I’m saying no to diets. It’s all about eating foods that I know are good for me, and good for my soul. If that’s a slab of dark chocolate or a Tiramisu after dinner I’m determined not to judge myself or make myself feel guilty for it.